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About Literature / Hobbyist ShelbyFemale/United States Group :icondepressionawareness: DepressionAwareness
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Deviant for 10 Years
Needs Core Membership
Statistics 42 Deviations 296 Comments 4,292 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

Count the Days
by day 3 I was used
to waking up
at dawn
for pricks
by needles
and "shh, sweetie, go back to sleep."
leaving gauze question marks
on forarms.
by day 4 I walked
the parimeter of the ward
17 times
trying to breathe
and pretend I was somewhere else
by day 5 we talked
about leaving
and diagnoses
and "if she starts again..."
by day 6 I had forgotten
what I looked like
when I got there
"the new pills are doing wonders
for my self-esteem"
by day 7 I lied my way out just to do it again next week.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 6 1
Mature content
Up :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 7 0
Today I've grown.
My legs are longer,
My bones are heavy.
My scars stretch and burn.
My soul is deeper.
My eyes are opened.
My scars stretch and burn.
My brain is softer.
My neck is tighter.
My scars stretch and burn.
                        and burn.
                           and burn.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 6 3
DevID1 by lionessoftorment DevID1 :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 1 0 Fire by lionessoftorment Fire :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 1 0
Mature content
Queen :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 1 0
9:51.  9:40.  Raegan.
9:52.  9:41.  Raegan.
9:55.  9:44.
"Time to get up."  9:56.  9:45.  I stood up in the cold, grey drowning pool.  The carpet felt like nails beneath my feet and I wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep.  My body was too small and frail to be standing like this.  Still. Calm.  Silent.
My mind was racing through my life as one big blur of blood and guilt.  11...12...I picked up my clothes off the table and walked into the bathroom.  The linolium was cold too.  Who left the water running?  I could hear the beeping of the alarm the whole way in here.  It's Saturday.
I stared at myself in the mirror for what seemed like hours.  My hair was getting longer and my eyes were darker around the edges.  A gorgeous shade of purple and silver underneath them.
"Rae, you look
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 1 0
Rock Love by lionessoftorment Rock Love :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 0
I want to go home
But I don’t know where you are right now.
All that’s left is the vision of your ghosts
On the prowl for my innocence.
Darling, your appearance
Is being washed away by the dirt and the rain
The face and the name is
Going away again.
The dirt and rain fall down and
Your heart slowly fades into
The darkness of how empty we became
On this road, paved
With your blame.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 1
Confessions of a Fat Bulimic
Turn up the stereo
Pull my hair back
Open the door and
Wash my hands
Sit down
beside the clothes and
My hands in my mouth
Cover the sound
Opening my eyes
Empty myself.
Stand up and stagger
Wash my hands once more
Brush my teeth
and shut the door.
Enter my room
dirty and cluttered
fall on my bed
internal butterflies flutter.
Trapped once more in an empty stomach
Screaming inside with panic
Eat a fist full of food again
God, this is mechanic.
I'll wipe the slate clean
In the Summer,
I can sleep off the hunger pains.
In the Fall,
I can skip meals.
In the Winter,
I can exercise.
And in the Spring,
No ones home to hear.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 35 39
Never Again
I found a four leaf clover
From you, but it started to wilt.
I threw it in the dumpster and
Left it to be filled-
Up with old clothes and rotten food,
Dirt, socks, and bad moods,
Shredded papers and snapped rope,
Broken toys and lost hope.
I said
I wouldn’t give you a second chance
But somehow I got lost in the clichéd romance.
The flowers and candles never got old.
Rings and love songs never lost hold
Of my heart-
But you did the day you finally cracked.
That day that you packed up your things and moved back
To the country and farms and horses and mules
The place in the world where they don’t have rules
About how you should treat another’s heart
And how you shouldn’t rip them apart
You tore me to pieces and I’ll be damned
If I ever let you hurt me again.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 0
In the Eye of a Former Love
Open your eyes for me and
Look up into my brain that
Is trapped inside my heart.
It’s like a tug-of-war match
Between a puppy and his owner;
Hoping that the internal strength of the innocence
Will over come the physical strength of the old.
My heart is taking shots at
My insides and my outsides and
Your insides and outsides…
They’re cold and tired now
Stained with all of the memories that
Lock me inside of you.
It’s just a tear in the eye of a former love.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 18
Grey Horse by lionessoftorment Grey Horse :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 0
At the End of the Day -Part 1-
There's no water where I want to be.
But there are roads.
and sand.
and peace.
I promise that the war of words
and graffiti
has decreased since
we were last here and
When I wake up in the morning
Swallowed inside the sand dunes
and the
They live without the water
and I live without the practice.
When the sun sets in the evening,
I carry the dust behind me;
the red sand;
and the burning lights.
And I know it will be
Just one of those nights but
At the end of the day, I am here.  I am where I want to be.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 0
Horse-y by lionessoftorment Horse-y :iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 0 1
In Seattle
My soul flew way above;
Above the punk rock,
Goddess, and
The girls in baby doll dresses.
And the Seattle skyline
Got far too complicated for me
Because it's bedtime and the
Sun hurts my eyes.
The amps hurt my ears.
I have a baby doll dress.
But I think it makes me look pregnant
And I don't want to deal with the questions
Because I'm not.
The pop-punk scars the world below
That was impenetrable to begin with
And the emo kids
with their own scars
Bleed for the sky
In Seattle.
:iconlionessoftorment:lionessoftorment 4 6


Bulimic rainbow by insignificantartist Bulimic rainbow :iconinsignificantartist:insignificantartist 254 107 Borderline Bear by Wiste Borderline Bear :iconwiste:Wiste 45 17 Studio Ghibli Charms by yael360 Studio Ghibli Charms :iconyael360:yael360 502 58 Am I on stairway to heaven? by averinbe Am I on stairway to heaven? :iconaverinbe:averinbe 1 1 little rascal by ariseandrejoice little rascal :iconariseandrejoice:ariseandrejoice 177 38 Griffin by pyroenigma Griffin :iconpyroenigma:pyroenigma 1,484 186 Premade BK 524 by FairieGoodMother Premade BK 524 :iconfairiegoodmother:FairieGoodMother 61 8 Pirate Callie by MalunkeyDaStock Pirate Callie :iconmalunkeydastock:MalunkeyDaStock 7 1 Scary Teddy Plushie by tavington Scary Teddy Plushie :icontavington:tavington 143 46 Using The GIMP :: Cell-shading by saphiremomo Using The GIMP :: Cell-shading :iconsaphiremomo:saphiremomo 1,639 276 Dark Matter by ii2eaper Dark Matter :iconii2eaper:ii2eaper 83 17 Winking Tiger by Mizzbo-360 Winking Tiger :iconmizzbo-360:Mizzbo-360 17 5 Totoro by YourImaginaryF Totoro :iconyourimaginaryf:YourImaginaryF 544 52 ponyo fan art by itagues ponyo fan art :iconitagues:itagues 28 10 Immemorial by natalievonraven Immemorial :iconnatalievonraven:natalievonraven 71 21 RAWWWR by NickiStock RAWWWR :iconnickistock:NickiStock 4,217 594


Hi there,

So...I'm a college graduate.  Whoa.  In May I graduated with a BS in Psychology with a minor in Chemistry.  I graduated Cum Laude, as an Honor Student, was a member of Psi Chi...all kinds of cool things.

Now I'm bored.  I'm trying to be more to Deviant I go... :)


  • Listening to: the TV
  • Reading: the Wonderful Wizard of Oz
  • Watching: Kitchen Nightmares on BBCA
  • Drinking: Water


Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
* My name is Shel
* I'm 22
* I have a degree in Psychology
* I take random writing and lit classes because I'm a wannabe writer

Current Residence: NC
Favourite genre of music: Metal. Rock. New Age-like. Alternative. Grunge.
Operating System: OS X
MP3 player of choice: iTunes.
Favourite cartoon character: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles



Add a Comment:
averinbe Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2010
thanks for a fav. :aww:
btw. great music sense ;)
natalievonraven Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2010   Traditional Artist
Thanx for :+fav:ing Immemorial! [link] Infinitely appreciated :tighthug:
HannahAbbot Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the watch!
Koujin Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2010  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the fav! :3
cherrichan13 Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for joining :iconthewrittenrevolution:, we’re delighted to have you with us. Welcome to the revolution. :salute:

We’re quite a busy group. :aww: We have a new feature: our chatroom is now open 24/7! Drop in and visit us. We’re also great fans of llamas. There’s always plenty to do, we hope you get involved! :dance:
jneen8 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the watch!! It means a lot :D :rose:
Kumoxsama Featured By Owner May 10, 2010
Thanks for the watch!!
doggygirl356 Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
LIONESS ! *glomps*
lionessoftorment Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
haha. hi
doggygirl356 Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2009  Hobbyist Digital Artist
what's up? :3
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